How to be a better networker and make lasting relationships
Rajesh Setty does know something about networking and making relationships, and he proved it well last Thursday. A well rounded presentation highlighting topics filled with positive reinforcements that could be easily incorporated in our daily lives was what made Rajesh stand out. Imparting knowledge through a 2 ½ hrs session filled with energy, humor, wit and active participation made the evening incredibly worthwhile.
A few takeaways from the presentation are listed here below:
Introducing yourself, the Boxing Match
o People tend to ‘box’ you before getting to know first. It happens all around us and Rajesh emphasized staying ‘away’ from the ‘box’ing game.
o An easy trap is to say something like “I work at Cisco”. This sort of introduction does not say anything about you and boxes you into something the user has experienced about Cisco (good or bad).
o Your introduction should say something about you that is relevant to the listener. Be relevant, so that if and when the boxing does happen, you are put in the ‘right box’.
6 word memoir
o This was a very interesting exercise as it raised a question for all of us to try: Write your memoir, how you would like to be remembered in exactly 6 words. Try this exercise for yourself. It will be amazingly revealing, I promise!
Likeability
o How likeable are you to others? People respond to likeable people more than others. So put that smile forward and become approachable today! Think for a moment all the people you know, and identify who you think really likes you. Now grow that circle.
What matters to you?
o Whatever matters to you, think through it and internalize it. What is it that you value? Is it fame, money, title? We tend to spend our days keeping up with the day to day activities and not realizing what is that core value that we are striving to achieve? If you have not answered it yet, take some time to pen that downs
o Create a graph with time on the X axis and your core value (or what matters) on the Y axis. Plot where you are today and mark where you want to be,say in 5 years. Obviously, this point is roughly in the North East direction.
o Your network needs to have people who can help you get to that point.
• Now here is key. How can you help in someone's "What matter's graph?"
o You can help in someone else’s “what matters” graph either by shortening their time horizon or providing additional value or both.
o If you can be of value to someone’s “What matter’s” graph, then you have made a lasting relationship.
Making powerful requests
o Asking the right questions is critical. And when you do ask, ask in a powerful way. These powerful request will become opportunities to add value to both parties, not just for the person asking the question.
o Rajesh mandated us to make one powerful request in the group. His notion that there is tremendous help around, the only barrier that we need to overcome is ASK. We need to ask in a way that creates opportunities and thus transforms a simple request into a powerful one. This was a fear -breaking activity filling one with humility!
o Rajesh has a number of examples of reframing questions in his blog.
There is no simple way to summarize the learning from the evening. Rajesh made it clear right in the beginning that the value you get is proportional to your input.
Make sure to check out Rajesh’s blog consistently for continuous knowledge feed and growing professionally and personally! Also read the two free eBooks mentioned in the previous post.
Contributed by Dipti Jain
Rajesh Setty does know something about networking and making relationships, and he proved it well last Thursday. A well rounded presentation highlighting topics filled with positive reinforcements that could be easily incorporated in our daily lives was what made Rajesh stand out. Imparting knowledge through a 2 ½ hrs session filled with energy, humor, wit and active participation made the evening incredibly worthwhile.
A few takeaways from the presentation are listed here below:
Introducing yourself, the Boxing Match
o People tend to ‘box’ you before getting to know first. It happens all around us and Rajesh emphasized staying ‘away’ from the ‘box’ing game.
o An easy trap is to say something like “I work at Cisco”. This sort of introduction does not say anything about you and boxes you into something the user has experienced about Cisco (good or bad).
o Your introduction should say something about you that is relevant to the listener. Be relevant, so that if and when the boxing does happen, you are put in the ‘right box’.
6 word memoir
o This was a very interesting exercise as it raised a question for all of us to try: Write your memoir, how you would like to be remembered in exactly 6 words. Try this exercise for yourself. It will be amazingly revealing, I promise!
Likeability
o How likeable are you to others? People respond to likeable people more than others. So put that smile forward and become approachable today! Think for a moment all the people you know, and identify who you think really likes you. Now grow that circle.
What matters to you?
o Whatever matters to you, think through it and internalize it. What is it that you value? Is it fame, money, title? We tend to spend our days keeping up with the day to day activities and not realizing what is that core value that we are striving to achieve? If you have not answered it yet, take some time to pen that downs
o Create a graph with time on the X axis and your core value (or what matters) on the Y axis. Plot where you are today and mark where you want to be,say in 5 years. Obviously, this point is roughly in the North East direction.
o Your network needs to have people who can help you get to that point.
• Now here is key. How can you help in someone's "What matter's graph?"
o You can help in someone else’s “what matters” graph either by shortening their time horizon or providing additional value or both.
o If you can be of value to someone’s “What matter’s” graph, then you have made a lasting relationship.
Making powerful requests
o Asking the right questions is critical. And when you do ask, ask in a powerful way. These powerful request will become opportunities to add value to both parties, not just for the person asking the question.
o Rajesh mandated us to make one powerful request in the group. His notion that there is tremendous help around, the only barrier that we need to overcome is ASK. We need to ask in a way that creates opportunities and thus transforms a simple request into a powerful one. This was a fear -breaking activity filling one with humility!
o Rajesh has a number of examples of reframing questions in his blog.
There is no simple way to summarize the learning from the evening. Rajesh made it clear right in the beginning that the value you get is proportional to your input.
Make sure to check out Rajesh’s blog consistently for continuous knowledge feed and growing professionally and personally! Also read the two free eBooks mentioned in the previous post.
Contributed by Dipti Jain
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